Domination Ch.2

L lay on the bed in his cell, his body curled up beneath the sheets, his eyes half closed. He might have been a corpse, his skin was so pale and his body so still. He had always been sallow and prone to strange posture, his bony flesh quite content with odd angles, but his imprisonment had began to bend him to extremes. He was becoming accustomed to a dull ache in his flesh and a ringing in his ears and all that he could do to stave the sensation was to suck on his fingers, running his teeth over and over the stumps of his nails for comfort.

It had been nearly three weeks since Light had first visited him in captivity. Within that time he had been fed, not well, but regularly. He had expected Light to cut off all food immediately, for at least a few days, before he came to talk to him again. This had not happened though, instead L was being treated as a standard prisoner with all the basic care. This meant that Light was thinking, considered his next course of action.

L clenched his teeth about his thumb, running his usual pattern about the ridge of the nail. He knew that he had really rattled his captor – he'd had a very strong success. The fact that Light had not considered attempting to starve L into submission showed this. The decision indicated that Light suspected such a tactic would be ineffective. He knew how stubborn L was. L had managed to grasp his finger about the one bargaining chip in his possession and, like a petulant child, he was determined to cling to it and never, never let it go.

It had made him want to laugh when Light had left him, after all it was a great victory but L was not naïve. He knew that Light would have a response at some point and not even he could be blasé about an impending torture. His emotions had ebbed significantly in the passing hours and days, and his head had begun to ache.

He had chosen to sleep a lot, it was natural. He tried to make himself as comfortable as possible and not spend the time waiting and wondering, speculating as to what the next course of action would be. He told himself that this the burden he had given to Light, it was his turn, he shouldn't let himself be weighed down by it. He had told himself that he could relax, that he held the ace, but he couldn't completely eradicate the doubt and that terrible anticipation.

He listened with interest whenever there were hard footsteps down the corridor, straining his ears for the sound. If it was one of the uneven, casual footsteps of the guards then L could let his head fall back to the pillow, let his eyelids fall. It was only for one particular sound that L cared for; the clean and clear sound of smart shoes marching down that prison corridor with a sense of terrible purpose.

He feared the sound and yet could not help but anticipate it, constantly, because he had no doubt of Light's return. When he, at last, heard the sound, so clear and unmistakable he felt his body shake with a unnatural tremor and had to steady himself before the cell door was opened.

Light looked just as well-dressed as he had done on his last visit and his hair was carefully brushed back, smooth behind his delicate ears. He looked stern but calm and collected and stared at L for a long time, within the doorway, before speaking to him. L did not rise from the bed to meet Light's as he entered.

'I'm moving you today,' were the words he spoke, at length, soft and yet tainted with a sharp, mechanical quality, 'get up.' There was a small escort of guards beyond Light, L could see, although none were armed.

L analyzed Light's expression; he looked very resigned. Could he mean to execute him? It seemed unlikely, impossible even, as L knew how much he wanted L as his prisoner, especially now L had taunted him. He pushed himself off from the bed, working to make himself be as in-charge of his bony limbs as possible. He knew it would be pointless to try and conceal the weight he had lost, the decline in his condition, but he hoped to mask the lack of energy that he so keenly felt.

Light ran his eyes over L's protruding bones as the other man moved, slowly, across the room and a strange expression seemed to flicker across his lips. It has seemed akin to sympathy but, L considered, more along the lines of satisfaction.

He directed one of the men to cuff L and, limply, L allowed for a short pair of silver handcuff to be applied to his bony wrists. He was surprised that the guard tightened them so keenly to his skin, since he was so thin, he could barely move his hands for fear of the metal stinging the flesh. He supposed this must have been a stipulation, to keep him as controlled as possible.

'Do you mean to torture me?' L asked his captor, defiantly, trying to lick at the sores upon his lips, smoothing over the teeth marks. Light's reply was strange and unexpected.

'You think that I would not?' he asked, languidly, raising his smooth eyebrows. The phrasing was deliberate and increased L's apprehension but he kept his face passive, a mask of indifference, and shuffled along the corridor with his captor and his guards.

L considered his words for a time, in silence, then flickered his eyes to the guards either side of him. It calmed him to analyze them, to look at their smart military-style uniform, to count all the buttons and observed the restraints they carried. They were all strong, tall and well-built but quite young, with smooth boyish faces. L tried to catch the eye of guard nearest him, whose dark gaze was so dedicatedly fixed before him.

'Do your disciples know for what purpose you keep me here?' L asked, hoping that provocation might earn him some satisfaction, 'what do these young man think of you keeping a man merely to rape and torture?' He thought he saw a flicker of discomfort fleet across Light's face but when he replied he was alarmingly calm and confident.

'Should you like to know their minds?' he said, smiling to the young man closest to L, 'you may answer the prisoner if you wish.' It was only then that the boy allowed his dark eyes to flicker to meet L's. His gaze was intent but delicate.

'Our lord sees fit to punish those who have defied him,' he said, although there was compassion in his gaze. He spoke with the fervour of a fanatic.

'Such zeal,' L said sadly, 'you call a man a God, even when he so clearly acts out of lust and self-interest.'

'You'll not sway my men with arguments,' Light replied, 'not that I'd give you opportunity.' He nodded at the young man who immediately cast his eyes away from L again, as if he did not exist.

'I am L,' L declared, unwilling to let go of the only diversion he had been given in days, the only opportunity for a game of wits, 'I am the great detective that challenged Kira, you must know this. I have seen him in his greatest moments and his lowest – he is just a boy, a poor, mad child with a desire to pretend. You can see he is flesh and blood and delusion. I could tell you so much about him, he has secrets and shames like any man.'

'It is a poor attempt, L,' Light told him derisively, 'to mock me before my guards. I do not fear your question, it is feeble, but I will force your submission.' He was quiet for a time, his head lowered as he considered his own words, and they all walked on in silence.

They came, after a time, to a new cell, beyond several sets of heavy security doors. L watched Light type the codes into the keypad but he could tell from the young man's smile that the codes were always changing, beyond an easy hack.

'Thank you, you may stay back,' Light addressed his guards who fell behind in their steps, standing dutifully by the closed, locked doors. This allowed Light to stand with L, quite separately, by the new cell door.

'I wish for you to understand,' Light began, very slowly, 'that what I mean to say to you, now, is very serious.' He stared directly into L's eyes with an intensity that surprised L and sent a thrill through his body. Instinctively he twisted his hands behind his back and felt the cuffs dig into his skin. 'I hope you will listen carefully to me and really consider my words.'

L licked his lips, nervously, and attempted a smile for his captor.

'I have always taken you very seriously, haven't I, Light?' he said, 'It would be especially foolish for me to not take you seriously now, given my position.' Light's expression did not alter. His face looked older, placid and grave. His mouth was tight and stern and his eyes were dull.

'Then, you must take me seriously when I tell you then I am not making any idle threats or bluffs with you,' his brows lowered and he glared, passionately at L, 'I feel it is beyond any such tactics. I will not engage in a battle of wills so characteristic of our previous exchanges. I need to break that chain. It is my own weakness that stands in the way of this – my own way of thinking…I find it easier to struggle, more…desirable, than a clean cut. I know that I cannot… 'play' with you anymore though L. We are far too much beyond that. I must do this, if I have a chance of getting what I desire – and I must accept it if I cannot have what I desire.'

L was staring at his captor's face in confusion, particularly alarmed by Light's final admission. It concerned him that Light was preparing to admit a defeat – if this was true then he would concede to loosing L. If that were his meaning then…Light could be suggesting that he intended to execute L, if he did not comply. L tried to keep the fear out of his eyes, he reassured himself that Light would not want such a course of action.

'This, L,' Light said carefully, 'is what I intend to be your cell – if – if you will not consider submission.' He then opened the cell door and, roughly, took hold of L's wrists, pushing him just inside the door.

Forced inward, awkwardly, L had the sudden claustrophobic sensation of being pushed into a small dark hole. The cell was a smooth square of grey-black concrete with no windows, no furniture, no amenities. The only discerning feature in the bleak homogeny was an ugly metal drain set into the floor. L felt himself leaning back against Light's hand and a lump rose to his throat.

Light was firm behind him, excreting pressure but holding him steady, as if lingering upon a hold just to throw L in, all the more cruelly; it was bitter threat. L felt Light lean closer, pressing his face beside L's own, his lips at his ear to speak to him. It was an intimate gesture that contrasted horrifically with the words he began to whisper.

'You will be locked in here, in the dark, pressed between these walls, with nothing but your own thoughts to keep you company,' L felt Light lick his lips but sensed there was something he was struggling with, despite his intensity, 'I suppose you might think that would be enough. I thought it would be enough, myself, when I considered confinement. I survived the confinement that you put me through, yes. I considered that I could withstand anything but I have since thought more on the subject and I know that, really, such convictions were foolish.'

Light swallowed and L felt the movement of the man's throat as he did so, the heat of his body as he considered the horrors of torture and imprisonment.

'I know, truly, that no man can be above his flesh. You can't pretend that severe deprivation won't hurt, won't get under your skin, won't rot your brain. I wish I could pretend that I could preserve my will but L – no man can retain his respect, his dignity, when lying in the filth and the dark, no man – not me, and not even you.'

He paused and the silence seemed even more pronounced in the small dark cell. L could not suppress a shuddering in his skin, aware of an itching deep within his flesh.

'I can give you only one chance,' Light whispered, 'you shall have only one opportunity to weaken your position, after that I will close the door. I will shut you up in this cell not for days, L, not for months to break your will, but for years. You must not think that I cannot do it, because I have searched myself, and I know I can. I will live my life, as a god, as a ruler, with my luxuries and my diversions and I shall not think of you.

You will be shut away in this cell and you shall not be visited. Food shall be delivered and retrieved by a shaft, no one shall ever enter here for any purpose. You shall not be given new clothes, you shall not be given anything fresh, anything clean or any opportunity to wash. You shall like less than an animal, in a black box filled with your own shit – and I won't come back to barter with you further. There is only one chance L, and you must decide now.'

L closed his eyes, and breathed, in and out. He knew the reason why Light was speaking to him so baldly, so clear, and why he had stressed the need for L to take his threat seriously. It would be L's instinct to call Light out, to try and bear his punishment, but if Light were to make such a treat seriously then – he must know – that there would be no reprieve from such a decision.

'You must not test me, L,' Light told him, 'I have made my choice and I mean this, you shall have only one chance, there shall be no bargaining and once you have made this choice and I have shut the door I will not respond to your desperate calls, even if they come only just as I am applying the locks – it will be too late. One chance, L, just one chance.' L felt Light move back, away from him, and with the absence of his pressure and heat came a fear and a panic. He knew that Light had begun to await his answer and he may not wait long.

L swallowed, determinedly, and without turning around he addressed Light, in a steady, quiet voice.

'Very well, Light,' he murmured, 'I will…negotiate.' He knew that Light was smiling, although he could not see his face, he sensed his pleasure and his relief.

'I hoped you would be reasonable,' he whispered, 'you may compose yourself and then we shall negotiate.'

L had searched the mirror before being guided to a new, guarded room with Light. He had run his hands over his face and attempted to brush away some of the fear, the panic, the anxiety and the shame. He knew that this choice had allowed him to try and retain his dignity, and Light had given him that opportunity because it was something they both valued so dearly. He wanted to face his captor calmly, with his usual unreadable expression.

He had managed to restore his features somewhat, by the time he was collected, but there was a hollowness about his eyes that could not be completely brushed away. He found himself ushered to a small, plain room with guards stationed at every corner. In the centre there was a table where he was seated, and cuffed, and Light seated himself opposite him.

'This is my offer,' Light said, 'it is a generous one. You shall have a comfortable room with a wide selection of books to pass the time with and pleasing decoration. There shall be an en-suite bathroom with bath and shower facilities. You shall be given nice clothing and be given good food and attention. The amenities will, in short, be quite great.

For half an hour everyday You shall be moved to an adjourning waiting room while your room is cleaned, tidied and your laundry taken away or returned. You shall have minimal contact with guards and I would request that you do not attempt conversation with them – I have ordered them not to respond to you in any way. In return you will accept visits from me in which you will surrender yourself to me sexually, without resistance or complaint, and work to please me however I see fit.'

L remained quiet for a few moments his eyes downcast as he considered the proposal, and, gently, chewed one corner of his mouth. He could feel the rough calloused edge of one of his sores as he drew his teeth across it and it gave him a relief to focus upon it.

'Will you listen to my terms?' He asked, after a while. Light smiled at him, pleasantly, as if this were the most casual of conversations.

'Of course,' he responded, 'let me know what you want.'

'I want notice of any visit, with at least an hour's time to compose myself,' L told his captor, 'and I want your assurance that you will be…considerate. If you wish for more than simple compliance from me then you must concede to this.'

'It is reasonable,' Light said, gently, 'I can promise this.'

'You…understand what I mean by 'considerate?' L asked, delicately, fighting the urge to look away from the other man and instead staring defiantly into his eyes.

'I assume you mean that I should not be too..indelicate, too vulgar, too violent. I am willing to consider your comfort.' L met Light's gaze for a time and then looked down, thinking, and picking at his fingers behind his back.

'I want sweets,' he announced, suddenly, 'chocolate and treats.' He heard Light give a little laugh, one of his more innocent, un-offending sounds of mirth. It was the sweet and pleasant rippling laugh of a young boy.

'You shall be given sweets upon occasion,' Light told him, 'though I do not intend to make it a stipulation of your regular diet.'

'I would like, at the very least,' L protested, 'a regular ration of one chocolate bar per week.'

'Very well,' Light conceded, coolly, 'I shall promise you that. Have you any other requests?'

'Yes,' L murmured, flicking his hair out of his face and staring at the smooth surface of the table in-front of him, 'I should like some soft toys to furnish my room.'

'Some soft toys?' Light repeated quietly, it appeared that he was enjoying himself.

'Yes,' L replied, 'I shall want company, comfort and diversion.' Light shrugged and replied pleasantly.

'As you wish.' L nodded ducking his head down, awkwardly, as the negation began to draw to a close.

'I…may request other things, in time, as I consider what I might need?' L asked quietly.

'Certainly,' Light replied, 'I shall consider all your requests.' He then clicked his tongue in a way that L assumed must be a signal for a guard came over to press a firm hand to his shoulder. L felt numb to the contact and didn't bother to look up at the young man's face, to see the bland expression of duty and devotion.

'Our negotiations are over,' Light announced, 'I shall be visiting you tomorrow night, at seven.' He bared his teeth in a twisted smile, 'I assume that this would be considered sufficient notice…'